For Sunday: The Bridge



He that cannot forgive others breaks the bridge over which he himself must pass if he would ever reach heaven; for everyone has need to be forgiven.

~ George Herbert

A key leadership attribute is the ability to forgive.  There is a need for it in our homes where simple misunderstandings can turn into unnecessary arguments and sadness.  There is a need for it between neighbors where insignificant differences lead to undying bitterness.  There is a need for it in business when disagreements occur and there is refusal to compromise leading to wasted resources in litigation.  Unwillingness to forgive leaves many nurturing grudges and planning retribution.

People have asked me over the years how to forgive others, especially when they are victims of something that seems unforgivable.  Simply put, the solution is pure love or charity.  All of us make mistakes and are imperfect.  As Mr. Herbert teaches above, everyone has the need to be forgiven.  Even you.  How do you increase your pure love for others?  In my experience, the key is to choose to see them not as objects, but as other human beings just like yourself sharing this journey we call life.

Choose today to forgive those who may have wronged you.  It will be liberating and powerful in your life.  You may be limiting yourself by allowing the actions of others to control how you feel.  Take back control by truly forgiving and choosing not to let the agency of others dictate who you are.

Choose forgiveness.


One thought on “For Sunday: The Bridge

  1. Reblogged this on The Career Mentoring Project and commented:
    Forgiveness opens a path for a person to move forward. Forgive does not mean “forget” or allow a wrong to continue! Sometimes true forgiveness can only be given once you know longer associate with someone.

    If you can’t forgive 100% … Try forgiving 5%. Forgive a little more and then some more.

    Makes sure others know when they are wronging you. People can be oblivious to their impact on others. Don’t assume they know you feel wronged!

    Keep the proper distance between yourself and someone who is treating you in a way that will require forgiveness. Give second or third chances when it makes sense. If poor treatment continues you can’t live your life as someone else’s plaything!

    Forgiveness for big wrongs is tricky. Get the advice and help you need. Make changes that are needed or order to fully forgive and free yourself from negative or destructive circumstances.

    You can change some things. Know what those things are. If change doesn’t occur make the appropriate choices as gracefully as possible.

    If change does occur then encourage it! Everyone must keep their new promises. If it’s not a real change and just to placate you … You will know what to do next.

    Keep your eyes open. Good relationships at home and at work bring out the best in people and are full of natural give and take. If it’s a one way deal that requires constant give on your side you will come to resent that situation or person.

    Fill your life with situations and people who want to work for the benefit of everyone. Give people time to understand your position on things. Don’t expect perfection. Do make needed changes to free yourself from negative situations that don’t improve given sufficient time and patience.

    Your life is short. Make the most of it by forgiving in the proper way.

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